I am a MAN!!!

This piece is an homage to Nikki Giovanni's "Ego Tripping (there may be a reason why)".

I am a man!

You don’t know who I am?

I am Adam father of all men

I live on my own moon circled by all the planets

I eat sorrows and I digest happiness

I slave in fields of fire and fields of pain

I feed my family riches and clothe them with love

I am a man!

You don’t know who I am?

I teach unborn seeds about my forefather’s ideas of equality and peace,

So new that they’ve never been discovered.

I wear medals of my achievements

I’m the master and the slave, I have no ruler

I oppress hate in a concentration camp on the surface of the sun

I commit murder with my hands and I create life with my heart

I am a man!

You don’t know who I am?

I hold a spear in one hand and literature in the other

I break the spear and I kill you with words from my rhyme book

I protect innocence from hardships with a life poem

My muscles are the mountains separating tribes

My mind is the sun that brightens dark rooms in lonely universes

Shooting salvation tipped luminescent arrows at your soul

I am a man!

You don’t know who I am?

I sit in the promised land talkin shit about Cleopatra to Ceasar

I sip 100 proof Milky Way water and create the Sahara when I’m dehydrated

I am the beginning, the present, and I have no end

I’ve destroyed uncivilized villages and rebuilt thriving kingdoms

I have open wounds in my palm and a thorn crown as a gift from an old friend

I am a man!

You better know who I am!

I gave my rib to create my worst nemesis

Humble, caring, loving, ambitious, righteous, protective…Man

I don’t know who I am but I know I’m a man

Without me no one could ever hear your roar

So don’t ever forget who I am

I am a man!

~Johnny~

When The Day

When The Day

When……..

A word so minuscule never meant something more monumental

When……..

When will you come

Will you come when doubts break shackles and escape you

When shells of protection form wings and take flight to depart your heart

When words of anticipation seep into your mind

Infecting your soul

Causing your eternity to yearn….

Maybe even desire

At the least want

Me…..

When…..

When will the space between us become the love that encompasses us

When will my dreams become your reality

Do you wait for God sent signs

Do you fear jumping out of your “what is” life boat to swim to my

“what should be” paradise

When can I hold your hand and lead you to us

I wait watching the hands of time wave precious goodbyes

Meanwhile I build

Demolish old prisons of self pity and heart break

Then I rebuild

Perfecting this love

Ensuring it is untainted and matchless

For you….

I’ve constructed castles of security

Full of rooms of adoration for you to live in

Fill my empty halls with your echoes

Made a bed of passion with pillows of fulfillment

For you to lay your pretty head on

Let me cover you with blankets of peace

Give me your warmth to thaw my frozen soul

And tuck you in every night with arms of devotion

Cover you with kisses of affection as you dream

Wanting to tell you these things but my words run away

Like a slave fleeing from bondage imposed by my tongue

Though my chains of circumstance have come undone

I remain

Waiting……

Waiting for the day

Clear as pure light and flawless diamonds

Serene as the breath of sleeping babies and angels lullabies

Passionate like the first and supreme like an aged love

Perfection I call the day

Look into your eyes and lose my sense of control

They are pools of infatuation

Untouched in abyss’s of reverence

It always starts with a flutter and then a bump

Beats like a war drum until it is ready to explode

My heart pounds into a frenzy

Anticipation wraps its powerful anxiety fingers around my being

And time stands still

As your voice commands the attention of my ears

Sweet was the sound that left an origin so succulent

Impregnated with reciprocation

Finally……

Your affirmation gives birth

To a life that my existence has been waiting lifetimes to live

Until then I patiently await

The day……

When……

When you confess to me

“I am yours”

~Johnny~

Empty......

Empty…..

Empty like pockets in ghettos.

But still my voided heart can’t let go.

Maybe if when it counted I let you know…

That it always was and can only be you mi amour.

That even your flaws I adore.

Or how for you my love is eternally thorough…

And how it continues to grow.

I wonder if it never was then would I still be…

Left wondering if it ever could be?

To be mine do I have to beg and plead?

If so darling just say the words and fulfill I will gladly that need.

I want an “us” but at this point I’d settle for a “you and me”.

Why can’t I label this feeling as infatuation or love?

Why does happiness fit so well with sadness like a cruel joke from above?

My deepest emotions I confess yet they seem to evaporate into thin air like steam.

I wish I could take a vacation from reality and escape into one of my dreams.

At least there I can have some kind of peace or control.

At least there I can have you as my queen for the whole kingdom to behold.

Whoever said its better to have loved and lost probably…

Never set sail on its rough seas.

Locked it away in a vault of fear and defenses and threw away the keys.

But I didn’t know you were a master of thieves.

Because even though you managed to steal it, my heart I want you to keep.

Lord please…

Give me relief!

Because I don’t know how much longer I can handle this grief!

Was a time when the thought of her brought a smile to my soul.

But now it’s the memories that I mourn and each time with each one I die inside a

hundred fold.

Guess we won’t need these one way tickets out of this lonely world.

At least not together.

For in my place there is another.

Just pray that surpass does his, than my love for her.

~Johnny~

Love SIck

Love Sick

Its like cupid overheard my most perfect fantasy and put her into flesh and life.

Cuts away my insecurity and fear does her presence like a putty knife.

God must’ve equipped her with not only the tools but also the skills.

Because she’s torn away my armor like banana peels.

She’s climbed the walls around my heart that I’ve built too high, with ease.

The craving for her love brings me to my knees

I pray and plead for him to make her mine

We were once sour grapes but together through time,

I just know we will be the finest of wine.

Close my eyes and drift into vivid memories of her

Brilliant and bright and colorful and clear

In some way the imaginations draw me near

To our love that never had a go,

Upon her my undying adoration I want to bestow

But somehow silence has become the perfect language

All my infatuation and desires have been placed in bondage

Sick of stepping stones, I want my own rock of love on which to stand.

Open my mouth to scream my emotions, but my voice is muffled by circumstance.

Can’t help but spend precious time in day dreams.

About the first time I saw you and all the wonderful times in between.

Constantly wonder about what you do and whether you are safe

Are you happy where you are and if you ate.

Do you think of me half as much

Of our last time and do you also yearn for a touch.

Are we just two birds lost on life’s rough winds

Or will we one day let go of you and I and let we begin

~Johnny~